


Zero

by isthatbloodonhisshirt (wasterella)



Series: Sterek A-Z Challenge [26]
Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: But not as sore as Lydia, Derek is a Sore Loser, Established Relationship, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-07-19
Updated: 2017-07-19
Packaged: 2018-12-04 02:32:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,317
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11545635
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wasterella/pseuds/isthatbloodonhisshirt
Summary: Derek opened his mouth to insist he didn’t want to be on the winning teamthatbadly, but Stiles beat him to it.“Deal.”“No,” Derek turned to glare, “notdeal.”“Deal,” Stiles said again, emphatically, shifting his gaze from Scott to Derek. “Trust me. We got this.”





	Zero

**Author's Note:**

> Teen Wolf (c) Jeff Davis.

Derek was annoyed.

Derek was getting increasingly annoyed the more time passed.

He was sitting crushed between Mason and Stiles on the couch, watching Scott make an absolute idiot of himself on the other side of the coffee table. He had to make an idiot of himself, because Derek didn’t understand the crazy shit he was trying to tell him.

“Come on, Derek!” he insisted, almost whining. “You know, it’s like… a hobby?” Scott glanced down at his card briefly, as if checking the word choice before glancing back up. “It’s something people do for fun? They go out, in the sun. They throw a ball around.”

Derek just kept staring at him, arms crossed and eyes narrowed. Scott was beginning to look more and more distressed until Lydia finally called time.

“Baseball, Derek! It was baseball!”

“Why didn’t you just say the American pastime?” Derek grumbled in annoyance.

“Pastime is one of the words he can’t say,” Lydia explained, standing and straightening out her skirt with a smile. “So that was fun. You’re extremely bad at this game.”

Not surprising, in Derek’s opinion, considering he _didn’t want to be here_. Scott was by far the most childish Alpha he’d ever come across. It made sense, given he was fresh out of being a teen, but Derek didn’t think he’d been this lame when he’d become Alpha. He’d been nineteen. Scott was now twenty-one, but he was acting like he was twelve.

Apparently this was ‘pack bonding time.’ Scott’s idea of bonding time was playing board games. Everyone had resisted at first, mostly coming over to Scott and Stiles’ shared apartment to hang out and half-heartedly participate, but the more they played, the more fun they had, and now it was a weekly thing. A weekly thing everyone liked _except_  Derek.

And it wasn’t because he was always on the team that lost. Of course not. It had _nothing_  to do with always being on the losing team.

“Turn that frown upside down,” Stiles insisted, poking him in the cheek and then kissing where his finger had just touched him. “It’s just a game.”

Tonight’s torture was _Taboo_ , an increasingly annoying game where they were paired off and given a word that the other party had to guess without using specific words. Derek could see the forbidden words beneath ‘Baseball’ on Scott’s card. They were sport, game, pastime, hitter, pitcher, and baseball. He should’ve just said ‘bat’ or something, Derek wasn’t an idiot.

Scott had done well though, considering whenever it was Derek’s turn to try and explain the word, Malia always, without fail, buzzed him out because he said one of the ‘taboo’ words written on his card.

Derek _hated_  this stupid game.

“Why do I always get put with the losing team?” he grumbled, annoyed. He ignored the partly hurt, mostly insulted look Scott sent his way.

“There are two people on a team, Derek,” Lydia informed him easily, checking her manicure as if manning the timer had somehow ruined it. “It’s not just the other person’s fault.”

“I’m pretty sure it’s always Derek’s fault,” Malia said bluntly, grabbing at one of the bags of chips near where she was sitting on the floor and checking the flavour. “Every time anyone’s on a team with Derek, they lose.”

Derek scowled at her, but before he could say anything, Stiles leapt to his defense. He knew it was more him trying to go for damage control than actually wanting to protect his honour as his boyfriend, but it was still a little annoying.

“Hey now, that’s not fair. I mean, I’ve never gotten paired with Derek.” He paused. “Actually, now that I think about it, I’ve _never_  gotten paired with Derek!” He pointed an accusatory finger at them all. “You stingy bastards!”

“You want him? Take him,” Scott said, motioning Derek. “Maybe I’ll actually win a round.”

“Hey,” Stiles insisted, pointing his finger at Scott while his other hand hunted blindly for one of Derek’s, grabbing it once it was found. “I’m willing to bet you anything that Derek and I can beat you and Lydia!”

“Anything?” Lydia asked, perking up with an almost manic gleam in her eyes. “Really?”

“Yes.” Stiles lifted his chin defiantly, shifting to lace his fingers through Derek’s. “That’s how confident I am that you’re all wrong.”

Lydia was starting to scare Derek a little bit, shifting forward in her seat and levelling Stiles with a smile almost as manic as the gleam in her eyes. This didn’t bode well, and Derek almost wanted Stiles to just drop it.

Almost.

“All right, Stilinski. If you’re so sure, let’s make a little deal. If you and Derek win, I’m willing to clean your entire Jeep, inside out, as many times as you want for an entire month. For Scott, he has to sit and watch all seven Star Wars movies with you without complaining or falling asleep as many times as you want for an entire month.” She turned to Scott to confirm his ascent and he nodded, looking pleased, as if knowing without a doubt there was no risk of that happening.

“And if you win?” Stiles asked, even though Derek wanted to stop him before he agreed to something they’d both regret.

“I get two gophers and arm candy for as many outings as I want for the month.” She flipped some hair that had tumbled over her shoulder back, smiling sweetly. “I need people to carry my things while I’m on a shopping spree.” She looked at Scott. “Scott?”

“No necking, no sex, no being inappropriate, no anything relationship-y in public areas or where I can hear them. Nothing.” He stared at them both intently. “I have walked in on you two _way_  too many times for my psyche. I’m done with it. One month of peace, or if you want to get together, you do it outside our apartment. I mean, you have a _loft_!” Scott insisted, motioning Derek. “Why don’t you ever go there?”

“Stiles is particular about his pillow. You know he can’t sleep without it, and he won’t bring it over.”

“Well you’re SOL for one month, then. Those are my terms.”

Derek opened his mouth to insist he didn’t want to be on the winning team _that_  badly, but Stiles beat him to it.

“Deal.”

“No,” Derek turned to glare, “ _not_  deal.”

“Deal,” Stiles said again, emphatically, shifting his gaze from Scott to Derek. “Trust me. We got this.”

“Good.” Lydia stood and smoothed out her skirt. “One round each. You choose who you want to guess on your side. Scott?” She turned to him and he motioned for her to take the floor.

Stiles didn’t discuss it with Derek. He just grinned and stood, letting Derek’s hand drop, and moved to join Lydia. He offered to let her go first, and Derek felt his mood souring further. Stiles was really picky about his pillow, which meant he wouldn’t come by Derek’s place as often as he wanted him to. And he also wasn’t very keen on being a gopher _or_  arm candy. This entire thing was supremely unfair considering Stiles won both favours if he and Derek won—unlikely, but irrelevant—and if they lost, Derek got to suffer along with him.

Unfair.

Lydia grabbed a card, turning to Stiles when he sat and got ready with the timer. When she gave him a nod, he started it, and then held the buzzer at the ready, watching her card while she started describing her word.

They were only twenty seconds in and they already had two down. Derek didn’t feel like this was going to bode well for him, and he was already trying to figure out if he could convince Stiles to just bring his pillow over.

He wasn’t happy about the Lydia side of the deal, but he was downright miserable about Scott’s side. Did he have any idea how hard it was to keep his hands to himself when Stiles was in the vicinity? There was a reason Scott always walked in on them, it was because Derek couldn’t keep his fucking _hands_  off him!

And now he’d _have_  to. Why had he let Stiles talk him into this?!

By the time their minute was up, Lydia and Scott had earned themselves nine points.

Nine.

Derek had never even earned one playing this game. They were fucking screwed.

Lydia and Stiles switched places, Derek scowling at the pleased look Lydia and Scott shared. They both knew without a shadow of a doubt that they were going to win. It made Derek want to just sit there and refuse to play. Was it a loss by default if he gave up? Knowing Lydia, probably.

“Hey,” Stiles said, forcing Derek to look at him. “We got this.”

“We’re going to be miserable for a month,” was his response.

Stiles just grinned and then turned to Lydia, nodding. She started the timer and Stiles looked back at Derek, card in his hand.

“Kill the whores.”

“Haunted House,” Derek said immediately, not even taking a second to think.

Stiles grabbed another card while Lydia stared at him, open-mouthed, but she didn’t have the chance to say anything because Stiles was speaking again.

“Condoms.”

“King size.”

Mason choked on what he was drinking on Derek’s occupied side, but he didn’t pay any attention to him because Stiles was grabbing another card. Lydia was looking at Scott, alarmed. Scott didn’t look any better.

“Crazy-ass psychopaths.”

“Colour,” Derek said instantly, everyone giving each other incredulous looks.

Another card.

“Bat to the face.”

“Uncle.”

Another card.

They got through three more before there was a pause.

“The most annoying part of your past.”

“High school.”

Stiles bit his cheek, staring at the card for a second. It was the first one he’d had to slow down for and he re-directed.

“Immortalized.”

“Oh, yearbook.”

He grabbed another card. Barring that one slight hiccup, Stiles only had to say a few words and Derek could figure it out. By now, they had surpassed Scott and Lydia, but they kept going anyway, Stiles determined to prove everyone wrong.

Derek hadn’t thought it possible, but the more cards he pulled, the more answers he got right. He didn’t know _how_  he knew exactly what Stiles was telling him, but he supposed it had to do with how close they were. They spent a lot of time together, even when they weren’t getting intimate. And they’d known one another for years. He supposed he was just really used to Stiles’ crazy by now.

That and he talked a lot. Derek didn’t always mean to pay attention, but he supposed the words still stuck with him.

Stiles glanced at the timer and grinned, grabbing one last card and staring Derek right in the eye.

“Regrets making this deal.”

Derek grinned back and said, “Zero.”

Then the time ran out.

On twenty-seven.

Stiles and Derek had gotten twenty-seven in the limited amount of time allotted to them. That was more than everyone had gotten all night collectively.

“What?” Scott asked, voice low and incredulous. “ _What_?” he demanded, more emphatically. “Are you serious?”

Stiles just grinned at him and shrugged, moving back to the couch and falling down beside Derek, leaning against him heavily.

“Okay no, you cheated somehow,” Scott insisted, turning an incredulous look on Lydia. “They had to have cheated!”

“Explanation now,” she ordered, crossing her arms, still holding the buzzer in one hand. “Kill the whores?”

“Derek and I stumbled upon a haunted house a few months back.” Stiles shrugged, lacing his fingers through Derek’s once more. “One of the ghosts was trying to bring me over to their side, if you know what I mean, so I yelled at Derek to kill the whores.”

“Bat to the face?” Malia demanded.

“Every time Peter does or says something annoying, Stiles says he wants to take a bat to his face,” Derek explained.

“ _What_?!” Scott demanded again, more emphatically, since he clearly wasn’t listening to their explanations.

“I almost went with ‘the number of fucks I give’ on the last one, but I wasn’t sure if you’d take that literally or not, because we both know I give you a lot of fucks.” Stiles grinned and leaned over so he could press his lips to Derek’s.

“Oh my God!” Scott insisted in his corner, still incredulous. “Are you serious? This actually happened?”

Stiles turned to grin at him. “Guess what we’re doing tomorrow night. Oh, and Lydia, you can clean the Jeep on a daily basis for the month.” He winked at her. “Thanks babe.”

Scott looked horrified. Lydia looked livid.

They had both been so convinced that they would win they’d agreed to things they would never have agreed to had they had even a chance of losing. And yet…

And yet.

Derek was still grinning. It was hurting his face.

“On the bright side, we know next time we play I can mention regrets and you’ll know the answer is zero.”

“You two,” Lydia insisted, motioning between the two of them, “are _never_  allowed to be on the same team ever again! _Ever_!”

Stiles just grinned at her. Derek laughed.

At least now they really _did_  have a reason to keep them off the same team. Apparently together, they were an unstoppable force.

Not that Derek hadn’t known that already.

He brought Stiles’ hand to his lips and kissed the back of it, getting comfortable in his seat, pleased when Scott proclaimed bonding time was over and retreated to his room.

While everyone else filed out, Stiles and Derek remained on the couch.

And if Scott walked out of his room two hours later only to shout in horror and slap a hand over his eyes, he had no one to blame but himself.

It wasn’t Derek’s fault Scott had lost.

**END.**


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